-- Posted by Anonymous at 10:16 pm on Oct. 18, 2008 I've had some issues and incidents lately and got referred back to my counselor. I went the other day, and it didn't accomplish much. Basically we came up with the fact I'm stressed mainly because college and my future career, and that I need to get more sleep and drink more water. I didn't need to go to a counselor to hear that. I have a difficult time talking with her. She's nice, but that might be the problem. She almost talks to me like I'm a scared, small child; purposely talking in a soft voice. I've never been to a different counselor, but when I've been at home or whatever and something's been bothering me, my parents or friends would just come out and ask what's wrong. They wouldn't try to figure it out, they'd just ask and be direct. They're strict and to the point when they ask. It's not necessarily a bad thing, they're concerned. It's basically the opposite from my counselor and I'm having a difficult time opening up to that type of counseling. What advice do you have? I really don't have another reason to not see her other than the fact she's abit too friendly but yet with this way I don't accomplish anything. She makes me feel like I'm back in elementary school by the way she talks to me. I have a difficult enough time talking about my "feelings." When someone talks to me in such a manner it makes me shut them out even more. -- Posted by Alternative Twitch at 10:18 pm on Oct. 18, 2008 I'd tell her exactly what you just told us. If she doesn't immediately change her approach then you NEED to look elsewhere. -- Posted by Skip at 10:22 pm on Oct. 18, 2008 in all honesty, it's what counselors are supposed to do, they're supposed to be nice and understanding because it's a great approach to getting people to talk about themselves and open up to their problems -- Posted by dreamweaver at 10:22 pm on Oct. 18, 2008 Change counselors and explain to the one you currently have, why. It won't offend them as it's more common than you think to do. Mine told me even before we started regular sessions that I am free to request a different counselor if I don't think we fit together. -- Posted by Discordany at 10:25 pm on Oct. 18, 2008 Tell her; many counsellors are like that because many of their clients are timid/ scared, and it puts them at ease. Your counsellor is probably perfectly capable of being direct, if she realizes that you would prefer that. That being said, if you do talk to her, and she doesnt change her methods, its time to search for a new counselor. -- Posted by Anonymous at 10:26 pm on Oct. 18, 2008 Quote: from Skip at 10:22 pm on Oct. 18, 2008 in all honesty, it's what counselors are supposed to do, they're supposed to be nice and understanding because it's a great approach to getting people to talk about themselves and open up to their problems True, I get what you're saying. Even though my friends/family, whoever, thought I had a problem and needed to deal with it, it was basically the "you're not leaving this room until you tell me what's going on" deal. Although they're not the ones with a Phd, it worked and went better than seeing the counselor. I don't come from a highly sensitive environment so I'm not use to people talking with me like the counselor does. -- Posted by Skip at 10:27 pm on Oct. 18, 2008 either discuss this issue with the counselor or find a different one its ur choice -- Posted by Watch this at 1:03 am on Oct. 19, 2008 You know what? I had the same problem when I was 14.. except it was with everybody. I had depression and everyone started talking to me like I was sick and they started being extremely nice to me, to the point that it was just questionable. One day I just went ahead and told them "Hey! stop talking to me like I'm hopeless!" and they stopped. But first they said that they didn't notice that they were talking to me too nicely.. I didn't believe them and still don't. I don't feel like anyone is being too nice to me anymore because of my actions. I think it's more about relying on what you do.. but I don't really know enough about your situation. If you ever want to tell me anything about that situation just send me a private message and I'll get to you as soon as I can. -- Posted by fleur de saison4 at 12:12 pm on Oct. 19, 2008 ugh i feel you i hate when counselors are all condescending