-- Posted by MourningAir at 3:20 am on Nov. 2, 2008 I just keep crying, I am so unhappy. I'm tired of living, I've been tired for the past 6 years... and I don't know what the hell to do anymore I feel so fucking alone and stupid and like an ugly bitch who no one could ever want to even fucking talk to I for real have no options left. I've done counseling, been put on several different meds, self-medicated with drugs, tried to force myself to feel fine, became extremely indifferent to everything but I am fucking DONE, I can't do it anymore. I'm so sad and alone here at college and all I want is my mom to be here to hug me and tell me it will be ok but I know it won't be, it never has been. the few moments I could bear haven't been worth the nightmare I've been living in, I just want out of my own fucking head -- Posted by Frubeling at 3:24 am on Nov. 2, 2008 I think everyone does at some point, but in reality there's nothing you can do about it except all the things you listed. -- Posted by Poker Shark at 3:31 am on Nov. 2, 2008 I don't know what I can say that will make you feel better. I feel the same way a lot of the time and don't know what to do so I'm not gonna pretend to have the answers. All I can say that might be comforting is at least you're not alone in this. When I feel like shit I always have this fucked up idea that everyone else is just fine and I envy them. Being unhappy makes you feel isolated but I think a lot of the time there are people around you finding it just as hard even if they don't show it. Are you really alone or do you have friends but they don't seem close or do you just feel cutoff from your close friends emotionally? I feel completely alone even though I'm not really I'm wondering if it's the same for you. -- Posted by MourningAir at 3:34 am on Nov. 2, 2008 I have friends here but I feel like I haven't connected with anyone. I haven't been very genuine in the friendships I've formed because I've been so depressed for the past couple months that it's hard to even bother trying. -- Posted by hi sarah at 3:39 am on Nov. 2, 2008 why don't you leave school and go on a holiday for a while to clear your head leave everything negative behind and just go -- Posted by Poker Shark at 3:41 am on Nov. 2, 2008 Quote: from MourningAir at 9:04 pm on Nov. 2, 2008 I have friends here but I feel like I haven't connected with anyone. I haven't been very genuine in the friendships I've formed because I've been so depressed for the past couple months that it's hard to even bother trying. yeah it's hard to feel connected to friends when i'm depressed. one of the reasons i love E so much is it completely reverses that. but naturally i feel very lonely even with friends who are close i feel like somethings between me and the outside world you know?   all in the mind, i guess. -- Posted by scoopy at 5:34 am on Nov. 2, 2008 u better hang out with frends for few days...