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-- Posted by Lady Catastrophic at 12:44 am on Nov. 18, 2008
I need some real advice. I don't want to hear what I should, or shouldn't do with my body, my baby, my life. I just want some advice on how to do it, to the best of my abilities, and beyond. If you are a teen parent yourself but aren't a SL, PM me, other then that I trust only you guys to help me out at least with one of these questions? How do I fit this... baby into my life? What is the budget going to look like, solely for the care of the baby, monthly? What should my diet look like? What should I be worried about, what should I look to try and do before the baby comes? How am I going to break it to the people I love that I disappointed them, yet again? Thanks,
x
-- Posted by Maxxie at 1:02 am on Nov. 18, 2008
Q How do I fit this... baby into my life?
A - You really can't ask it that way.. If you are pregnant and planning on keeping the baby your life is going to start to more or less revolve around the babys needs.. You can no longer only think about your own needs because you got to think about your babys needs aswell. Q What is the budget going to look like, solely for the care of the baby, monthly?
A - I can't answer that question because I don't live in America, it does get pretty expensive though atleast over here. But the goverment also helps you here to take care of the baby very much.. through out the pregnancy to the birth and early childhood of the baby. Q What should my diet look like?
A - Well what I know about it is that you don't really have to dramatically increase your diet. But yeah you got to make sure you get all the nutrions needed for a baby to develope: Minerals, Vitamins, Proteins all that basic stuff. (also no drugs or alcohol from now on at all, preferabely if you smoke try to quit. And consult a doctor if you take some medicins) Q What should I be worried about, what should I look to try and do before the baby comes?
A - Make sure you try to ''prepare'' yourself for the baby. You could go to some ''moms'' or ''parents'' meetings where people like you talk about the pregnancy and about the future as a parent. You should definitely get some clothes for the baby and some equipment home needed for him/her, such as a bed and stuff. Q How am I going to break it to the people I love that I disappointed them, yet again?
A - Dissapointed? Don't aproach it like that please, just tell them you're pregnant and that's it. These kind of things happen all the time, and quite frankly it's normal to be pregnant. By now it doesn't really matter what others think you are the ones life which is affected.
-- Posted by TheatreMinelli at 1:18 am on Nov. 18, 2008
The first question is simple. The baby is your life, it will be your sole priority and rather asking how to fit the babay around your life, you should ask how to fit your life around the baby? Of course if you have a job/studies then there will be things in place to help you. Daycares, maternity leave etc. what I will say is though if you are at work even if the maternity leave is up you shouldn't go back unless its feels right. Also parental help can be very important in the early months of a babies life, and its always nice for them to have a good gran and grandad. Budget wise it can be as much or as little as you like, and no one will really be able to tell you exactly how much you are going to need to spend. all babies are different. Why don't you have a look at an online supermarket and make a list of everything you will need for the baby and reckon it up that way. It will give a more accurate description. Thats all I can really help you with now, good luck. xxx
-- Posted by Lady Catastrophic at 1:34 am on Nov. 18, 2008
Quote: from theatreminelli at 2:18 am on Nov. 18, 2008
 The first question is simple. The baby is your life, it will be your sole priority and rather asking how to fit the babay around your life, you should ask how to fit your life around the baby? 
That is really the same question, isn't it? My life is here now, and the baby has yet to come, how in the hell do I get those two together, how do I get them to fuse together nicely?
-- Posted by carbonara at 1:55 am on Nov. 18, 2008
Q How do I fit this... baby into my life?
A - I'm not going to lie and you're probably already aware of this but your life may have to change dramatically when the baby arrives. You're not going to be able to do a lot of things that you're probably used to doing on a daily basis. You're not going to be able to go out as much as before with your friends and people. You're really going to have step up and be all for your baby. I don't doubt that you've already thought about this but i'm just clarifying. There are ways for you to have a baby and have a life at the same time. When the baby actually arrives i'm sure in time you're going to adapt because you'll have to and you'll just learn to, don't worry about that. Hopefully you're going to have plenty of people around you to help you adjust. Q What is the budget going to look like, solely for the care of the baby, monthly?
A - A lot of people will tell you that having a baby is so expensive, but it's not really. If you want it to be expensive then it will be. People will tell you that you need all this crap for the baby, but in actual fact a newborn baby doesn't need half the things its bought. There are ways for you to 'economise' your spendage. The most pricey thing for you is going to be nappies, but you could always use the much cheaper alternative, Terry nappies which are cloth nappies that you can wash and re-use. But for convenience real nappies are probably easier. Your budget really isn't going to be as big as you're expecting, as long as you buy the essentials each month, like nappies, wipes, milk etc all your baby needs after that is love and attention. Here in England it would cost you about £70 a month just for those 3 things, which is like $140. Q What should my diet look like?
A - The only thing i can suggest here is a healthy diet. Lots of protein, calcium (this especially for you because a lot of women suffer from weakened teeth when pregnant). Eating things like meat, vegetables, cereals, anything that you would deem healthy. I would also try and cut out cigarettes and obviously alcohol. Also when pregnant remember you're not allowed to eat, runny eggs, mayo, shelled seafood, nuts. When you go to all of your check ups etc (i'm not sure how far gone you are and who and what you've seen yet, sorry) the doctor is likely to give you information on your diet. Q What should I be worried about, what should I look to try and do before the baby comes?
A - You shouldn't be worried about anything really. If there is anything you're worried about then there are plenty of people available to talk to, your doctor, family, people you know with babies etc. The main things that you need to try and make sure you get done before the baby comes are getting something for the baby to sleep in, this is usually what we call a moses basket, i think you call it a bassinet. You're definitely going to need things like blankets, bottles, clothes, pram etc. You also need to make sure that you are happy and healthy, that's all that matters to your baby. You need to make sure you're emotionally ready for this otherwise when the day comes you're going to panic like hell. Make sure you are on good terms with the ones you love. Tell people, celebrate. See this baby as a blessing and not a burden. Q How am I going to break it to the people I love that I disappointed them, yet again?
A - You know, telling your family that you are pregnant might seem like a scary thing and you're probably crapping yourself just at the thought of telling them, but the best thing to do is just bite the bullet and say it, get it over and done with as quickly as possible. If you are with the father of the baby then make sure that break the news together. If you show a united front then they're less likely to be angry because they'll see just how responsible and grown up you are. Please make sure that you are ready to tell them when you do, be strong and tell them in a very 'matter of fact' way so that they can see that you are ready and you are mature enough to handle this. At first they'll probably appear mad, but i promise you in time they will appreciate what you are giving them, you are bringing another life in to the world and that should be celebrated. They will get over the anger and turn that in to support and love for you and the baby. Once they are on your side they will most likely be able to help you with the questions above. I hope that I've helped you in some way, if you have any more questions then please don't hesitate to message me.
-- Posted by Lady Catastrophic at 2:07 am on Nov. 18, 2008
Quote: from carbonara at 2:55 am on Nov. 18, 2008
Q How am I going to break it to the people I love that I disappointed them, yet again?
A - You know, telling your family that you are pregnant might seem like a scary thing and you're probably crapping yourself just at the thought of telling them, but the best thing to do is just bite the bullet and say it, get it over and done with as quickly as possible. If you are with the father of the baby then make sure that break the news together. If you show a united front then they're less likely to be angry because they'll see just how responsible and grown up you are. Please make sure that you are ready to tell them when you do, be strong and tell them in a very 'matter of fact' way so that they can see that you are ready and you are mature enough to handle this. At first they'll probably appear mad, but i promise you in time they will appreciate what you are giving them, you are bringing another life in to the world and that should be celebrated. They will get over the anger and turn that in to support and love for you and the baby. Once they are on your side they will most likely be able to help you with the questions above.
Wow. Wow. Thank you so fucking much, this is the best advice as far as talking to my parents go. GOD I feel 12 again, when I got my period and couldn't bring myself to ask my mom for tampons, or even to let her know forever. 
-- Posted by TheatreMinelli at 5:16 am on Nov. 18, 2008
Quote: from xsharpi at 9:34 am on Nov. 18, 2008
Quote: from theatreminelli at 2:18 am on Nov. 18, 2008
The first question is simple. The baby is your life, it will be your sole priority and rather asking how to fit the babay around your life, you should ask how to fit your life around the baby?
That is really the same question, isn't it? My life is here now, and the baby has yet to come, how in the hell do I get those two together, how do I get them to fuse together nicely?
Not really. Your life holds....utterly and completley. Your baby IS your life now. The old life if it is incompatible with the child gets discarded.
-- Posted by Lady Catastrophic at 7:37 am on Nov. 18, 2008
Quote: from theatreminelli at 6:16 am on Nov. 18, 2008
Not really. Your life holds....utterly and completley. Your baby IS your life now. The old life if it is incompatible with the child gets discarded.
It really is the proper question to be asking. My life is without a baby, and now I have to figure out how to fit the baby into my life. The baby isn't my entire world right now, it couldn't possibly be that way, or feel that way for months now which is why I asked HOW DO I FIT IT IN MY LIFE.
-- Posted by Hi Carie at 1:42 pm on Nov. 18, 2008
Hey lovey. so many of these questions are better answered by reading some good pregnancy books. My best friend just had a baby, and these are the books she recommended: #1--What to expect when you are expecting by Heidi Murkoff. this book is supposed to be excellent, and it is divided by semester, so its easy to find/resource. Check it out. #2--Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin. this book talks alot about the actual childbirth process, what to expect, questions you should be asking etc. Go to the library and find their section on pregnancy and childcare and start reading. It will make you feel more prepared for what is to come. In other news: When are you due? What stage in this process are you at right now? What did your dad say? Have you heard back from him?
We are here, all the time, to answer any question you have. Dont feel like you have to have every answer tomorrow, but be prepared for your life to change. my inbox is always open sweets.
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