-- Posted by Anonymous at 10:21 am on Nov. 19, 2008 Okay, so I have lied to my boyfriend about something really big and there was no reason to lie to him about it. When I was really little, I went to this weird private preschool where i was mollested and possibly raped. i have never told anyone about it because i was not 100% sure what happened. the closest ive ever come to telling anyone was a few months ago. I told my boyfriend i was raped, but for some reason i lied and told him that it was when i was eight years old. i told him because i wanted sympathy, but i lied. now the relationship has become very serious. we are talking about marriage and forever. every now and then the topic of the rape comes up. i dont know what to do, should i tell him, or would that risk our trust. he wants to tell the police, and i dont know what to do. i feel so guilty for lying. I love him so much. i dont want to lose him, i need advice. -- Posted by Arrow at 10:22 am on Nov. 19, 2008 tell him the truth -- Posted by Fishboner at 10:22 am on Nov. 19, 2008 Tell him the truth. -- Posted by santana 08 at 10:22 am on Nov. 19, 2008 u lied about being raped? or you lied when you said it was at 8 years old? -- Posted by butterflikisses at 10:23 am on Nov. 19, 2008 1st you should have never lied about being rape.... that is not something to joke about I think what you should do is ust tell him the truth. -- Posted by Frubeling at 10:24 am on Nov. 19, 2008 Youre having a breakdown? Lets mosh! Silly bit over Tell him, why not? Its not going to change the circumstances. -- Posted by Anonymous at 10:24 am on Nov. 19, 2008 Quote: from santana 08 at 10:22 am on Nov. 19, 2008 u lied about being raped? or you lied when you said it was at 8 years old? for some reason, i told him i was eight. -- Posted by FallingAwayFromMe at 10:24 am on Nov. 19, 2008 Tell him the truth, he'll understand, and tell him you said you were 8 so that it didn't sound so bad, as you were actually younger. -- Posted by Anonymous at 10:26 am on Nov. 19, 2008 how do you guys think he will react. -- Posted by soldier side at 10:26 am on Nov. 19, 2008 Quote: from storm at 1:22 pm on Nov. 19, 2008 Tell him the truth. yeah, tell him the truth -- Posted by somebody555 at 10:42 am on Nov. 19, 2008 sympathetic -- Posted by e99 at 10:48 am on Nov. 19, 2008 omg.. im so srry for u, my gr8st sympathy goes out to u.. it must be somethin terribl to experience..i think that if u trusted 2 say smthin so personal to him, n u felt comft. tellin him, then u shulda gone wit the whole truth, he wulda not seened u n.e diff. then wat he sees u now. it was lng ago like u mentioned,.. he probly wuld get a lil bothered NOW but its not like u did smthin major, u shulldn feel guilty, u can tell him that it was a long time ago n u dnt wana take it to the police, or if u wana feel better next time u guys talk openly about it n the timing is rite jus throw it in there in the convo. bring up ur age..n wen he asks like wait a min.. i thought u was 8" jus say no i was in pre skool, n if he catches on jus say i was like 4,5,8 it was around that age or make it seem like u did tell him but he must have missed that part..n then say " it dsnt really matter" ..that u dnt wana go to the cops.... unless u do.. Or jus brush it off..the important thing is that u feel comf. tellin him..basicaly, this is personal no mater wat ppl say to u here u shuld do wat u think its best! good luk -- Posted by e99 at 10:50 am on Nov. 19, 2008 u can tell him the truth... -- Posted by Bearsy at 12:05 pm on Nov. 19, 2008 The truth will set you free. -- Posted by amiee at 2:39 pm on Nov. 19, 2008 This is a really tricky situation because you did experience abuse and you've only lied about your age when it happened. It takes a lot of courage to tell someone about that kind of thing, so I think it's amazing that you did. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I was abused as a child and have made out to my friends it happened when I was a lot younger so that they wouldn't be so worried about me. What concerns me about this post is that you said you lied because you wanted sympathy. I'm not sure. If it's something you feel really bad about then, by all means, tell him. Explain that you were actually a lot younger than eight when it happened but that it did still happen and you need his support and care, y'know? I don't know how he'll react but I don't imagine he'd be too mad. It did happen, just at a different time than you've implied.