-- Posted by HeartofJuyoMk2 at 8:01 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 I feel so sick. My depression is getting worse despite all the therapy and medicine i've been through. Now my mental issues are making my stomach out of shape and I can't eat normally. I don't really know what to do now. I have so many issues, and some of them i just wouldn't wish upon my worst enemies. I feel so much pain, but I have no constructive way to release it. When I speak, I hurt others, and when I stay silent, I become violently ill. Is it possible that depression can kill without suicide? I can only stop the pain for a few moments by reading a book, and I've already spent most of my money on new ones, and they are quickly becoming less useful. I'm getting weaker and weaker every week, even with my weight training class i'm losing weight. I have no passions in life, save a dream which I can't attain. I have so many people who dislike me, and the number rises every day. I'm my own worst enemy, and even through this, I understand that I can't get rid of my depression, because I don't want to. My depression, among other things, is the one constant in my life. People, I'm not going to say I'm commiting suicide, but the prospect looks better and better every day. -- Posted by asia lover at 8:04 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 I am so sorry that you feel that way and I know that sounds like a complete cliche to say to someone who is depressed but I have been around depression for a while, my whole life. I have attempted suicide and I am glad to say that I failed. Please PM me if you want, I know that I can not solve your problems but just saying them all to someone can help you know? And I don't judge people so I want think of you any less. -- Posted by The Last Magister at 8:04 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 To be honest, no one here can stop you, I just pray you meet someone special enough to stop you, because it's what saved me. -- Posted by xcountry101 at 8:05 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 i know how you feel .. well.. not really i've never been on meds but umm the whole suicidal thing.. trust it's not worth it. life may be sucky at the moment but in the end there will be something good. as for passions.. get into a sport or something that helped me alot. truly death is not the answer. -- Posted by uber ewias at 8:05 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 i use to feel the same... wanna kno wut i did?... shit i started up weed n started popping thizzles... what u need is thizzles (extacy) it WILL HELP.... -- Posted by gman101 at 8:06 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 your not seeing the big picture. if you committ suicide your not just hurting yourself but your hurting your family and friends. bc you may be fine with the pain but they wont be. -- Posted by HeartofJuyoMk2 at 8:07 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Quote: from gman101 at 11:06 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 your not seeing the big picture. if you committ suicide your not just hurting yourself but your hurting your family and friends. bc you may be fine with the pain but they wont be. depression is numbing in that regard, eventually I just won't care about them. They're better off. -- Posted by XsmilygirlX at 8:08 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 I know exactly how you feel.  I am going throught the same thing.  If you want to talk PM me. -- Posted by Style Out at 8:13 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Go to a loving church :) -- Posted by HeartofJuyoMk2 at 8:15 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Quote: from Style Out at 11:13 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Go to a loving church :) religion can never help me. -- Posted by Style Out at 8:21 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Quote: from HeartofJuyoMk2 at 8:15 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Quote: from Style Out at 11:13 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Go to a loving church :) religion can never help me. When was the last time you gave religion a chance? -- Posted by asia lover at 8:32 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Quote: from Style Out at 8:21 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Quote: from HeartofJuyoMk2 at 8:15 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Quote: from Style Out at 11:13 pm on Nov. 29, 2008 Go to a loving church :) religion can never help me. When was the last time you gave religion a chance? Church is not always the best answer... -- Posted by ManiacPenguins at 5:47 am on Nov. 30, 2008 Your depression seems like it is getting to the point where you need to be hospitalized. You need to eat, even if it hurts you. If you can stay healthy, you have a much bigger chance of recovering from depression. Many depression medicines can make your appetite very small. You may want to talk to your doctor about switching medicines. I know you talked about reading books, but you may need to find another hobby, or something fun to do that will keep you distracted from your thoughts while you are feeling bad. Another thing you really need to do is to have a more positive outlook. Nobody can get better from anything if they don't believe in themselves. If you just believed that you could get rid of your depression, than that's a big step towards conquering it. I can say this all from experience, as I've suffered from clinical depression for the last 5 years. The very last thing, don't commit suicide. There is ALWAYS someone out there that cares for you, even if it's only a few people, they will be greatly hurt by your decision. Suicide doesn't solve anything except to get out of the mess that you got yourself into, if applicable. It may solve your problems, but think of the problems it will create from others. I hope you take some of these suggestions, Peter