-- Posted by Anonymous at 2:54 pm on Dec. 30, 2008 I just posted in emergency help and got no answer so I have to post here. I also know its a little long... I've been smoking marijuana for about 2 years. Recently (about a few months, half a year) I've started to feel very helpless and upset. I've been very paranoid about death, for example if I had a headache I'd think I had a brain tumor. I keep making up things that are wrong with me because I believe marijuana is some how killing me (even though I know nobody has ever died from it). I also feel like an awful person because I feel as if I've let my family down. I'm doing what most teenagers are doing my age and I feel awful for it. My parents also drank when they were my age which is almost equally as bad as smoking weed. I don't smoke cigarettes and I'm not going into harder drugs. Smoking just relaxes me. I also hate touching my things because I believe I have marijuana particles on me. If I sit in my boyfriends car (which we smoke marijuana in) I don't like coming in my house and touching things or using my blankets. I just feel helpless and like I'm a terrible person for acting in a manner of that of most teenagers (not offending people who don't smoke). I quit for about a month and had a fuzzy feeling like I was walking around in a fog. I feel like that usually because I do smoke often but it seemed to get worse. How can I feel better about myself? Why do I feel so helpless and have all these weird feelings? Why am I so worried of death when half of the world smokes and doesn't feel this way? I just feel like the whole world is collapsing on me. I just want to be able to smoke or not smoke without feeling awful... -- Posted by miNx at 2:56 pm on Dec. 30, 2008 paranoid. -- Posted by sweetness89 at 2:57 pm on Dec. 30, 2008 maybe you should try stopping again.if that doesn't work out, go see a doctor or something like that about it.hope you feel better. :D -- Posted by OkayKelsey at 2:58 pm on Dec. 30, 2008 talk about it with your friends? im sure they would be there for you if they knew how you feel. its probs a good idea to stop smoking cause thats probs why your paranoid. explain to your bf and he may be able to help you get over this. -- Posted by sadnessness at 2:58 pm on Dec. 30, 2008 I would have thought youd need a doctor. You sound as though you may have some form of mental disorder (isnt as scary/ weird as it sounds) but no one on here can really do anything for you other than a little verbal support. The best thing you can do is go and see your local doctor and get referred to a specialist who can give you some medication or counselling to make you feel better about yourself and your situation. good luck hun x -- Posted by deadsilence at 3:01 pm on Dec. 30, 2008 has nothing to do with marijuana just guilt. u hav to find a way to cope with that problem