-- Posted by Anonymous at 12:00 pm on June 26, 2009 My mum is really struggling with money these days. It's gotten to the point where she can't afford a decent amount of food shopping for the house each week. Now, I'm ok about this. I usually eat when out anyways. But I think it's really getting to her. My little brother is always asking for things and she says no, because she doesn't have the money. He is 12, so he doesn't understand very well what is going on and is constantly nagging about things he wants but can't have. I work, I get money. I give her money each week also. I have a stash of money that I have been saving for my holidays. I have offered to give her money if she needs it any time because I generally always have some money. She says that would all be well and gone but then would be back to square one and just have to owe it back to me. But I don't mind if she takes weeks to pay me back if it. I just don't know what to do about her. I can see how unhappy she is right now over money and I want to help, I can help. But she just won't let me help. How can I convince her just to take money from me? Because I really have no problem. If I don't need it right now and have enough, I will gladly give her money if she needs it. I think she feels like she can't keep taking money from her 18 year old daughter but I don't even have a problem with her doing it. -- Posted by Charolastra at 12:29 pm on June 26, 2009 Chances are it probably just means that she's perhaps spending less because the economy is going horribly at the moment but if she feels like she doesn't need to accept your money and you feel like she need it, give her the money in a way that will make her accept it. Tell here that you want to contribute to the household and you want to start paying rent for living in the house. This way you can rationalize giving her the money and she will have no problem accepting the money from her daughter if she sees it fit. That's pretty nice of you to help out though. -- Posted by Anonymous at 12:48 pm on June 26, 2009 Thanks for the reply. The thing though is she is struggling to pay the bills and make ends meet. It's not like she is going off to buy a new car or a new tv...It's actually bills. Phone, food, gas, rent everything. And I already give her money each week. I work, I get money. I give her money each week also. I said that there. I just want to give her more but she wont take it from me. If I could, I'd give it to her and not ask for it back but it is to pay for my holiday so I could need it back. -- Posted by Charolastra at 12:54 pm on June 26, 2009 You should give her to money if you really want to help out. If you're saving it for the holiday, it's better to put the holiday aside and contribute to the household if she's really that desperately in need of it. She may not want to take the money because she might feel like she'd have to pay you back for it and I don't think people want to get into any more debt right now. Just offer the money out of the goodness of your heart and she will take it. -- Posted by Porcelina at 9:49 pm on June 29, 2009 Tell your mother that you're an adult and you feel it is time that you contribute for what you are using. If she's not going to just accept your money tell her you'd like to pay a third of certain bills, or for the food that you eat. If she still absolutely refuses to accept your money then use it towards your younger brother. Not only will you be somewhat protecting him but you'll be lending your mother a huge relief from feeling bad about what she can't give him. I'm going to assume that you live in America? I highly suggest that your mother apply for food stamps and welfare. She likely won't be able to get it for you because of your age, but she will definitely be able to get food stamps for your younger brother and likely herself. My family (My mother, younger sister, and I) have been in a very similar situation for a few years. At first my mother was very stubborn and refused to apply for anything but finally, finally she applied for food stamps and welfare. Welfare is a massive hassle. We didn't get it because we weren't able to fully document every single paycheck that I've gotten, even though my paychecks are tax exempt and whatnot because it's a work-study government program at my college. But if you can, it's definitly worth going through the hassle. Food stamps were a lot easier, although I couldn't get them because I'm of age, and my mother couldn't either because she's a student. However they do provide it for my sister. Basically they give you like a check card that has a monetary value allotted to it monthly, and you can use it at stores like Wal Mart. Although you have to be very careful because you can only use it for food. Don't be afraid to push your mother to take advantage of these programs. They're difficulty to apply for is frustrating, but it's an effort to prevent fraud. I know a lot of people feel like they shouldn't need welfare, and a lot of people look down on those who receive it, but having assistance is certainly worth it. Good luck.