-- Posted by Teneille at 3:39 pm on June 1, 2006 I, having got two negative ratings recently, would like to take back my help. If the people who rated me badly didn't find the eHelp useful, then what are they still doing with it? And yes, I guess you could say that I am a bit miffed.  I actually put (as pretty much everyone does) a LOT of effort into the eHelps I answer, but mainly (and worst of all) they take me ages to do, because I am actually trying to help. So, for example, last night 35 minutes solely responding to one eHelp.  That's not too long, but it's all time I want back now.  Now that the effort for a fellow LW member has been wasted, because they only wanted to read a select amount of idea's. Can I delete them?  Can I bannish their ratings? Because above all (disregarding the fact that I could have been helping MYSELF for those minutes last night.  SL's have stressful and busy lives AS WELL) I don't feel altogether that eager to respond to the eHelps we get. Yes, I want to.  But do I want to put so much effort in?  Do I want to look at it, and brainstorm idea's to help?  Am I going to a minimum of a 48th of my busy day helping someone who is not going to want that help? Maybe, could negatively-rated eHelps go through moderators?  Or go through randomly picked SL's, just to make sure they are worthy of a negative rating? Or can I just delete the replies of mine that got rated negatively? Because an alternate point of view is NOT a reason to give a negative eHelp! And, by the way, this is and isn't because of the ratings.  I don't really care about my ratings, (well, since they're there, they are interesting and I try to keep them up) BUT it's because they are there, and I can see them, and I KNOW when someone has rated me negatively that I am writing this now. Ok.  It all sounds horrible, but I felt like shite when I got bad ratings.  I just don't agree, and I totally understand the big deal about them now. If so many SL's aren't happy with how they are right now, shouldn't something be done? -- Posted by Artistic Drain at 3:43 pm on June 1, 2006 Being able to remove negative ratings would completely defeat the purpose of the rating system. It is only two. You can't please everyone. So no, there is nothing you can do. -- Posted by audrey820 at 3:47 pm on June 1, 2006 I hate negative ratings too.  Especially when you don't see what you did that was so wrong. But I don't think we should just be able to erase the negative replies.  They're there for us to grow from, not to pretend that they never happened. So I understand what you mean, but I don't support the idea of clearing out negative replies.  I mean, the person who really matters is the one who was asking for advice.  And they already read it, so why should we just be able to hide that someone didn't  like our advice?   I still see what you mean about people rating it bad because you didn't agree.  And ideally the rating could be changed by a commitee designated to check replies with negative ratings.  But I don't think that will happen.  Mods are just too busy. Maybe replies that received negative ratings shouldn't be counted toward the total reply count.  So we can be certain that the person received at least 3 replies that they didn't think were unhelpful. -- Posted by Macropiper at 4:55 pm on June 1, 2006 I wouldnt be overly advese to informally warning, then formally warning, then banning people who gave out bad ratings without good reason, unfortunately, this becomes hard if they are guests or submitted anonymously. Maybe the moderators should be able to remove bad ratings, if the bad rating was unjustified, this would go some way towards putting what some people are doing wrong, right. -- Posted by ixi at 8:45 pm on June 1, 2006 I kind of like the idea of having someone check out the ones that were rated negatively.  I understand your frustration completely, by the way, I felt the same way when someone gave me a negative one. It kind of reminds me of secret shoppers, like in department stores.  They go through and check to see that things are being done right, and people aren't cutting corners.  It never hurts to double check sometimes. If that idea was ever implemented- having a support leader/mod go back and check those- I'd so volunteer for the job.   -- Posted by Teneille at 9:07 pm on June 1, 2006 Quote: from ixi at 3:45 pm on June 2, 2006 I kind of like the idea of having someone check out the ones that were rated negatively.  I understand your frustration completely, by the way, I felt the same way when someone gave me a negative one. It kind of reminds me of secret shoppers, like in department stores.  They go through and check to see that things are being done right, and people aren't cutting corners.  It never hurts to double check sometimes. If that idea was ever implemented- having a support leader/mod go back and check those- I'd so volunteer for the job.   I like that.  I would opt for a job like that also (but since I most likely wont be able to get on the internet much after next month, Im not so sure I would be a good idea). Also, because SL's are objective, and they read the eHelps as an outsider looking in, then they are much less likely to be influenced by emotion on a reply, like I assume the eHelp writer is. -- Posted by midnightcritter at 9:41 pm on June 1, 2006 I can understand that. Having a committee to look at negative ratings would be good. But I think what miffs me more is when I respond to eHelps and not get rated, while others do. And those who get rated have posted after me. -- Posted by audrey820 at 9:47 pm on June 1, 2006 Quote: from midnightcritter at 12:41 am on June 2, 2006 I can understand that. Having a committee to look at negative ratings would be good. But I think what miffs me more is when I respond to eHelps and not get rated, while others do. And those who get rated have posted after me. Maybe they didn't notice the rate thing when they read yours. Or they weren't sure how they felt about your advice.   -- Posted by midnightcritter at 10:13 pm on June 1, 2006 True. But it still puts a damper that I spent some time writing what I thought was a good post. Oh well. -- Posted by insertnamehere at 12:56 am on June 2, 2006 I don't see a problem. If a rating is bad, then look at it. If it was justified, then you should learn as opposed to trying to obliterating it from memory. If it was unjustified, shrug and move on. I've been given negative feedback for not condoning someone having a gay relationship with a 12 year old. Needless to say, I was distraught :p -- Posted by katyduck at 10:29 am on June 2, 2006 Quality of responses are objective. You cannot draw a definitive line under what's good advice and what's bad advice, not just for you let alone for everybody else, nor will we ever be able to. You put the time in, and as a Support Leader this is exactly your role. It shouldn't be about the ratings you receive, it should be about always trying your hardest to help someone, regardless of the time it takes or the manner in which they receive your advice. This topic is futile. -- Posted by dovelove at 10:33 am on June 2, 2006 Deleting the negative ratings would just defeat the point of having the rating system. Yes, you put in a lot of thought and effort into writing a reply, and it doesn't feel nice when it comes back with a negative rating, but that's not really the point of being a Support Leader. If you know your advice was good, be content with that. It's not really about ratings. Maybe if someone wants to give a negative rating, there should be a little form they have to fill out stating why they are rating it as negative, that is mandatory. That way, they could still give the negative rating, but the reasons would be delievered to the Support Leader who wrote the reply. -- Posted by Teneille at 9:07 pm on June 2, 2006 Quote: from dovelove at 5:33 am on June 3, 2006 Deleting the negative ratings would just defeat the point of having the rating system. Yes, you put in a lot of thought and effort into writing a reply, and it doesn't feel nice when it comes back with a negative rating, but that's not really the point of being a Support Leader. If you know your advice was good, be content with that. It's not really about ratings. Maybe if someone wants to give a negative rating, there should be a little form they have to fill out stating why they are rating it as negative, that is mandatory. That way, they could still give the negative rating, but the reasons would be delievered to the Support Leader who wrote the reply. If it's not really about the ratings, why do we have them? I know my advice was good.  That's why I gave it.  I wouldn't go around writing eHelps 'just because'.  I am content with the fact that I give good eHelps.  I am NOT content with the fact that these people who are apparently desperate for help and advice are so willing to stab the people who help them in the back. I do like your last paragraph though.  I agree. -- Posted by Teneille at 9:20 pm on June 2, 2006 Quote: from katyduck at 5:29 am on June 3, 2006 Quality of responses are objective. You cannot draw a definitive line under what's good advice and what's bad advice, not just for you let alone for everybody else, nor will we ever be able to. You put the time in, and as a Support Leader this is exactly your role. It shouldn't be about the ratings you receive, it should be about always trying your hardest to help someone, regardless of the time it takes or the manner in which they receive your advice. This topic is futile. What is good advice, and what is bad? When the intention is obviously to give good advice, and it doesn't help them, then HOW is it the SL's fault?  If they are a SL in the first place, it shows they try to help. Is it because they didn't read the eHelp correctly?  (I generally go line for line, paragraph for paragraph). Or, is it because the person who put the eHelp there, didn't explain well enough, for us to give them the perfect advice? If it's not about the ratings, then get rid of them.  If you don't want to, then you are going to have to put up with these types of topics for a while longer. I DID try.  And it backfired.  Are you the person who is going to give me my time back?  Because I tried, and apparently my advice didn't help, I WASTED time.  And the stupid thing is, it wasn't MY fault.  I tried my best.  I can't help it if the person who places the eHelp gives a couple of sentences as their problem, and they are the only one who knows the personalities of the people they are dealing with. The reason I haven't ignored those ratings, is because on that night, I had a million things to do.  My own problems, and I put the eHelp first because as a SL I felt I should.  I know I don't have to, I haven't been lately, so that's why. The length of time it took me to write those eHelps was enough to worsen the argument with my boyfriend,create anger within my mum AND DAD, and prevent me from finishing something important.  But if I can help someone, it's ok.  And I did HELP, it just wasn't recognised. Where is the compassion?  Do those members of LW who post their eHelps (which are LESS and LESS emergencies everyday) think those replies are generated by a computer? There are people behind them! -- Posted by Rhapsody at 9:31 pm on June 2, 2006 Quote: from Teneille at 12:20 am on June 3, 2006 Do those members of LW who post their eHelps (which are LESS and LESS emergencies everyday) think those replies are generated by a computer?   There are people behind them! I tend to agree about the ehelps being less and less of emergencies, personally I would like to see ehelps about relationships and that sort of stuff kept out of ehelp. As those clearly aren't emergencies. But then again it comes down to personal definition of the word emergency. (Edited by Rhapsody at 12:32 am on June 3, 2006) -- Posted by katyduck at 5:20 am on June 3, 2006 Relationship questions are left up because eHelp is the medium through which members can speak to a large number of Support Leaders exclusively about their problems. And because 99% of SLs dont bother their arses to reply on the support forums where these questions ideally would be located, who can blame them? -- Posted by audrey820 at 3:36 pm on June 3, 2006 I don't mind the relationship ones too much.  It's frustrating sometimes, but I know that for some people their relationship problems are an emergancy in their life. And they might have wanted to be anonymous. -- Posted by Teneille at 2:32 am on June 5, 2006 You know, I don't tend to reply to relationships.  It's not because I cant be "arsed", but because I have only ever had ONE boyfriend, and I hardly ever see him anyway.  I have absolutely NO IDEA what the heck I am supposed to be doing, so how can offer advice? That wouldn't be very responsible.  It's like a Sparrow teaching a fish to swim. I don't appreciate the "where can I find..." eHelps, when they could have made a topic, or just saved everyone some time and googled it.  Gees.   -- Posted by JennyColada at 10:24 pm on June 5, 2006 I wish that we could get feedback about our feedback. Like it the eHelp poster who rates us could say why they rated us the way they did, but chances are they'd only let us know if it was positive probably, plus who really wants to bother to fill stuff out for why they voted a certain way. I would love to hear how I, personally, could improve when I got get superb ratings, but unless the person leaves their name then there's really nothing to be done. We all understand how painful, annoying, and frustrating it is to see your hard work thrown back in your face, but hence is the life of a hormone-ridden teen. -- Posted by Teneille at 2:37 am on June 7, 2006 Quote: from JennyColada at 5:24 pm on June 6, 2006 I wish that we could get feedback about our feedback. Like it the eHelp poster who rates us could say why they rated us the way they did, but chances are they'd only let us know if it was positive probably, plus who really wants to bother to fill stuff out for why they voted a certain way. I would love to hear how I, personally, could improve when I got get superb ratings, but unless the person leaves their name then there's really nothing to be done. We all understand how painful, annoying, and frustrating it is to see your hard work thrown back in your face, but hence is the life of a hormone-ridden teen. Ok.  I accept that.  We try, sometimes we succeed, sometimes the desperate grasp the strength we give them, just enough to throw a punch our way.  Metaphorically speaking. I would like them to realise the crap feelings they give us though.  And that to steal our time like that SHOULD be a crime.  But then again, they are teenagers, and they (I would say "we" but I just stopped being a teenager) have a reputation for a reason. Alright.  Thank you for the posts, it helps to know what people are thinking/feeling. -- Posted by Rhapsody at 3:51 am on June 18, 2006 Quote: from katyduck at 1:29 pm on June 2, 2006 It shouldn't be about the ratings you receive, it should be about always trying your hardest to help someone, regardless of the time it takes or the manner in which they receive your advice. I agree with you that its not about the ratings one receives but when someone spends a great amount of time writing a response when they could be doing something better for themselves. But I feel as if some people do it out of spite and just because you tell them the truth which they really don't want to hear. At the end of the day its just a rating on an Internet forum.