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Printable Version of Topic "Single and hungover"

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-- Posted by gothfaerie05 at 2:35 pm on Feb. 11, 2007

Ugh. I'm past wit's end with this.

My boyfriend and I broke up Friday night after dating for about a year and seven months. He's been a complete ass since, and is acting more like the one who was dumped than even makes sense. He's been  irrational, has gone thru my shit, has tried to BREAK my shitto get my attention, and is pushing me to sanity's edge.

The night we broke up I hooked up with my roommate/friend. I really don't care if it was the best idea for keeping the peace. Social rules can blow me. I was feeling lonely, so I fell asleep next to my roommate in his bed.

The next morning Matt, my ex, woke me up saying I had some missed calls. Which meant he wanted to talk to me. He had read my away message on aim and CLOSED aim and the windows I had up WITHOUT ASKING ME, so HE coudl log on and look for sympathy from all our mutual friends, AGAIN, and had fucking counted my condems and was basically like "I forgive you" or "I don't hate either of you", like I was supposed to be SORRY for something after he decided to break it off.

In closing AIM he also lost the phone number from one of my few non-mutual friends in Louisville. I'd just worked up the nerve to ask her for it a third time since I'd lost it twice, and the convo wasn't saved.

He's been doing things like this constantly. Saturday morning he said he wanted an open relationship instead. Last night he tried to get my attention by blasting music as loud as he could on my tiny computer speakers and trying to wake me up. From where I had gone to sleep to stop thinking about the things he kept doing. He wrote me a two page letter about it. He leaves lyrics up on my web browser for me to read with passages highlighted about how miserable he is that things didn't work out. He's taken up my room and computer for three straight days, and keeps closing my aim and leaving his open so if anyone we know would even WANT to reply to my messages or maybe send ME something saying "if you ever want to talk about it I'm here", it doesn't happen.

He cut his foot a bunch of times with his razor and ended up using all of my gauze to bandage it. Which is what first aid supplies are for, but I bought them for accidents, not people being dumbasses. That part I guess is okay because he'll be replacing it.

Yesterday he went with our friend Beth to the liquor store. I asked if he could pick me up something if I sent some cash with him. He said don't worry about it, he'll buy something for both of us. He gets back and asks me to pay him back because he feels used.

I left the room last night after another long discussion where he tried to get back together with me and I had finally reached a complete emotional numb. Our other roommate offered me a drink, which I accepted readily. I sat down on the kitchen floor to talk, and out came Matt, who doesn't drink, but RIGHT THEN decided he would rather drink with us instead of sleeping.

At that point I decided to get trashed.  I couldn't get away from him and sure as hell couldn't sleep, and it was too late to go anywhere. He had a few shots and spent the night trying to act drunker than he was. It didn't take me long to stop caring or noticing, though.

Fucking everyone I know is showering him in sympathy when HE decided to break up with ME. It was mutually decided that our relationship wasn't going well. It was decided wholeheartedly on both parts that it was neither or both our faults.

He is only 2 weeks younger than me and he is acting like he is 2 years younger. I understand this is his first major breakup, but honestly. It's fucking harsh, but he needs to get over it.

When life give you lemons, you squirt life in the eye with them and try to find something to hide behind before it has time to reload.

Maybe it's because I have had somewhat of a rough life that I understand that the only coping method that really works in situations like this is to look at the situation in it's entireity, accept it, and move the fuck on. It's going to hurt like HELL for a while, and some amount of stupid decisions and moping is acceptable. But you can't put life on hold and it's not fair to make it hell for others around you.

I know it's hard, but you just have to grow a pair, suck it up, and move on.  


-- Posted by DthFlame666 at 2:40 pm on Feb. 11, 2007

i like the way you think or deal with breakups, yes its hard but like hell ur not willing to go all whiny and depressed. and ur bf sounds like he has some serious problems


-- Posted by atreyu313 at 2:42 pm on Feb. 11, 2007

god....i feel for you. that sucks. and by hooking up with your friend i dont think you did anything wrong


-- Posted by SexyAlenya at 2:49 pm on Feb. 11, 2007

yeah


-- Posted by gothfaerie05 at 3:02 pm on Feb. 11, 2007

Quote: from DthFlame666 at 5:40 pm on Feb. 11, 2007


i like the way you think or deal with breakups, yes its hard but like hell ur not willing to go all whiny and depressed. and ur bf sounds like he has some serious problems

Haha....yeah, I confess I'm doing plenty of whining and I'm still really torn up about things. I've been really bitter for the past few days. But I'm trying to deal with it by doing things that don't involve  making things miserable for people around me.

I confess that sometimes one has to vent when something hurts....hence this topic, lol. But life is far from over and whereas this didn't work out, and I really wish it did, I realize that's just the way things are. We're both still young, there will be plenty more opportunities in our lives and hopefully we both learned something from all this.


-- Posted by gothfaerie05 at 4:24 pm on Feb. 11, 2007

Oh well. At least I didn't wreck my car when I went driving afterwards.... >.<


-- Posted by tacky at 3:27 pm on Feb. 13, 2007

wow.


-- Posted by Still here at 5:31 pm on Feb. 13, 2007

Two words for you, move out! The best predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour. Do you wanna live with this for the rest of your life, cause thats where this is going. Make a stand, for you and no one else. He is never gonna change, don't keep yourself in such a derogitory and emotionally abuseive place, look after you, leave.


-- Posted by gothfaerie05 at 6:16 pm on Feb. 13, 2007

Quote: from Still here at 8:31 pm on Feb. 13, 2007


Two words for you, move out! The best predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour. Do you wanna live with this for the rest of your life, cause thats where this is going. Make a stand, for you and no one else. He is never gonna change, don't keep yourself in such a derogitory and emotionally abuseive place, look after you, leave.

That'd be a lot easier except if I move out, him and my roommate can't afford to keep the place we're in. I've thought about that more than a bit...lol. But thanks for the suggestion.


-- Posted by Anonymous at 3:26 am on Feb. 24, 2007

(moved)

http://www.golivewire.com/forums/peer-bpbeoe-support-a.html

so much for anon...i thought i clicked that


-- Posted by crfdude86 at 3:30 pm on Feb. 28, 2007

thats shitty dog


-- Posted by Khadgar at 7:01 am on Mar. 3, 2007

Quote: from Anonymous --cropped for ease of reading--at 6:26 am on Feb. 24, 2007


(this was the second time she had broken my trust)

*cough*

*shakes head*

NO.


-- Posted by Anonymous at 7:32 pm on Mar. 5, 2007

(deleted)


-- Posted by gothfaerie05 at 4:54 pm on Mar. 8, 2007

Quote: from Anonymous at 10:32 pm on Mar. 5, 2007


Quote: from Khadgar at 7:01 am on Mar. 3, 2007

Quote: from Anonymous --cropped for ease of reading--at 6:26 am on Feb. 24, 2007

(this was the second time she had broken my trust)
 

*cough*  

*shakes head*  

NO.


Khadgar, please don't assume to know about such things when at most you've only heard half the story, and that half could be totally irrelevant.  It wouldn't even matter if she knew what to or not to do to keep my trust.  She could still break it without knowing she was doing so, even if she didn't know she had it.

I try hard to be nice, and all weekend i've been lying and avoiding this subject when asked for both your and HER sake.  Its exactly the reason i have yet to mention certain things on this board.  And then i come back home and find this, which i'm still not exactly sure why it annoys me so much.  Maybe the gross arrogance of it and the fact that your defending something that really shouldn't be defended.  

Don't get me wrong, defend the girl all you want, but not those two mistakes of hers.


Hey, quit arguing on my old topics. I'd say if you're going to fight at least talk to each other directly, but seeing as I'd rather you did not at all. At least not where I'm going to hear about it.

Anonymous (you know who you are), next time you want to post a reply like that....I want to say post it as a separate topic with a link. I understand defending yourself, but it's almost like undermining what I say  on my own thing.

Defend yourself if you will, but I made this topic because I was really upset and needed a place to vent. And emotional support. Which is why it's on the emotional support forum. Posting a really long reply to defend yoruself that I KNOW will just upset me again becuase I have tried to read it several times and give up after one sentence because that's how long it's taken each time....not really cool. I understand what you meant to do, and that's okay, but this strikes me as inappropriate somehow.

Khadgar, the sentiment is appreciated. I really don't like being dissed ON my own emotional support topic....really not cool considering the context.

I assume by twice...no, I'm not getting into more past personal issues on a closed thread. This is stupid.

I was going to leave it alone, but you [anon] came back and edited again. And each addition to this seems to take a more argumentative note. I made this thread BECAUSE of the arguing and drama in the apartment and I have a distinct feeling that leaving this open is leaving an opportunity for more of it. No one needs that. I know if it's going to happen it's going to anyway....I'd just really rather it not happen in front of me.

If I sound mad, I'm not. I'm just mildly annoyed.

I'm asking a mod to close the thread.


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