-- Posted by SaraB at 2:09 pm on Feb. 25, 2008 my boyfriend of a year just broke up with me last week. its for real this time. you would think my friends (since prek btw) would want to help me through this for at least the first weekend i was alone... but none did. no one would answer the phone. they all feel so hopeless for me, that they decide to do nothing. so i am alone. everyone tells me i need to 'focus on myself' 'you have to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else' 'you have to find what makes you happy' BUT I DONT KNOW HOW. my time with my boyfriend was the happiest ive been in my life. ive never been a happy person. how do i focus on myself.. how do i figure out what makes me happy? i hate my major, i got fired from my job that i didnt really like.. i want to find want makes me happy! i want to find the major for me! but im about to graduate.. i hate it. i dont want to do this for the rest of my life. i miss my boyfriend so much. i cry everyday. im trying so hard. -- Posted by brunettechic at 2:11 pm on Feb. 25, 2008 It's going to take time before you get over him but you will. Just focus on school and others thing that are important to you for now. Things will get better -- Posted by SaraB at 2:17 pm on Feb. 25, 2008 but how do i 'focus on myself'... i hate school.. i hate what im doing... i dont know what it means to be 'happy with yourself'.. i dont have a job, but i dont know what type of job to get cuz im afraid it will end like my other job, stress me out and interfer with school. i dont know whats important to me... my goals in life: own a home, be married and happy. thats it. -- Posted by martink368 at 8:30 pm on Feb. 25, 2008 You focus on yourself by doing what makes you happy.  Get another job, and if it turns out you don't like it, quit.  You hate your major?  Change it.  Even if you have to graduate with the degree you didn't want and work at that for a while.  School will always be there, go back, do what you want.  If your friends don't treat you right, get new ones.  You won't be happy if you let people treat you bad or get roped into careers that you don't want.  Be a little bit selfish.  It can actually be a good thing.   -- Posted by neiyomee at 6:59 pm on Mar. 4, 2008 of course you have your family to turn to in times like that... there are a lot of things to get busy with, your favorite hobbies... getting new friends is also a welcome change, and following your heart's desire should be the thing to do... so change your major.  don't stop looking for jobs, at least they occupy your time